Chapter 60: Dionysus (4)
“Artemis, my sister.”
“Shut up. How dare you speak my name so casually, you unworthy human.”
“…”
Dionysus chose silence at Artemis’ venom.
Exactly as expected.
In fact, he was relieved.
Their plan with Silenus had factored in her personality.
And he was here to beg for the satyrs—no leverage.
“Hera’s letting you live. You really think you can claim Zeus’ blood and I won’t kill you? You trashed my forest. You dared to harm my people!”
“No. I’m just here to ask you to spare the satyrs.”
“Then you’re even more arrogant. You know what those lunatics did in a virgin goddess’ forest.”
The more he spoke, the worse it got.
He wasn’t even acknowledged by Hera.
And the satyrs had committed unspeakable blasphemy in a sacred place.
“I came for your mercy.
Just their lives—please.”
“…”
Artemis’ disgust deepened.
Provocation and a bet? That’s the only way?
She glared at her half-brother.
Neither god nor human—a half-baked thing staring her down.
That smug face pissed her off.
But Hera was watching. She couldn’t kill him.
‘What to do with this brat…’
After long thought, she passed the buck.
“If you want forgiveness so bad, Can you stand trial before Hera and let her weigh the crime?”
Dionysus froze.
Hera was not in the plan.
But Artemis’ expression left no choice.
“…Yes.”
Artemis’ messenger hawk reached Hera’s palace on Olympus.
“Lady Hera, a letter from Lady Artemis.”
“Hm? She wrote to me?”
Hera was puzzled—Artemis usually avoided her.
She took the letter from Iris and read:
> To Lady Hera,
> Dionysus came to me to protect the satyrs who ruined my forest.
> I would’ve executed them, but considering he’s Zeus’ bastard,
> I leave the judgment to you.
“Lady Hera, what does it say?”
Hera fell into thought, ignoring Iris.
She’d let Semele live quietly. But of course, Zeus’ son was already tangled with gods.
“Iris, Dionysus is active.”
“What? Hermes told him to stay hidden.”
“…”
Meanwhile, in the forest:
“I might die here…”
Since the moment Hera was mentioned, things had derailed from the plan.
The plan was to provoke Artemis into a bet.
But she was too rational—or maybe scarier than expected.
“Well, the fight in the forest already screwed everything.”
He later learned who had surrounded him.
Not just Artemis’ elves—
Their cloaks bore Gaia’s tree emblem.
And the merfolk—strangely found upon the land—bore Poseidon’s trident.
Those emblems meant direct divine forces.
If Artemis hadn’t stopped his magic, He would’ve killed Gaia and Poseidon’s troops.
Then not just the satyrs—he’d be dead too, no questions.
“Artemis probably demanded something… If this doesn’t go as planned…”
Dionysus touched the ring on his finger.
Night fell.
Selene’s chariot rose.
Under the crescent moon,
Artemis and Hera loomed over kneeling Dionysus.
“Lady Hera, this bastard’s first act in my forest was trying to kill Gaia and Poseidon’s followers.
That alone deserves punishment.
Yet he has the gall to beg mercy for the satyrs who defiled a virgin goddess’ forest.
Give me permission to deal with him.”
Dionysus had plenty to say, but stayed silent.
He wanted to refute every word from that rude sister,
But Hera was here.
A bastard like him could die any second.
“…”
But Hera had her own concerns.
Semele, hidden under Calypso, and King Cadmus still offered sacrifices in gratitude.
Hera wasn’t the kind of goddess to ignore loyalty and punish their son/grandson on a whim.
Even if she hated Zeus’ interest in him.
“Dionysus, anything to say?”
‘What? She’s not even angry?’
Dionysus was confused by Hera’s calm, rational demeanor.
Hermes and the Hyades had warned: get caught, you die.
And now she had perfect justification—this should be ideal for her.
Dionysus, lost in his own thoughts, snapped back when he saw Hera’s cold eyes staring down at him.
‘No. Stop. This isn’t the time. Everything’s gone off-script, but this is good for me. Stay calm.’
He chose his words carefully, speaking as calmly as possible.
“I’ll bear all the satyrs’ crimes and my own reckless intrusion. Just… please show mercy.”
He knew Hera’s question was a crossroads: ‘Death by Artemis’, or at least a ‘trial’.
And sure enough, Hera paused, then pulled something from her pouch.
“Fine. If you endure this and achieve your goal, I’ll forgive the crimes.”
It was the Mad Conqueror—a vicious cursed potion.
Only the creator could lift it.
So complex and deadly, only a goddess like Hera could brew it.
“Drink this. Go mad, then reach Rhea and perform the secret rite. If you succeed, Artemis’ incident is forgiven. And if you overcome the trial, offer a sacrifice Artemis will accept.”
To anyone else, this was incredible mercy. But for Dionysus, one part was unacceptable.
“Lady… the sacrifice…”
“Enough. The satyrs’ crime is grave. Even a god wouldn’t be easily forgiven. You, even less.”
Hera’s tone was final. Dionysus bowed, accepting.
Any more demands would cross the line.
“…”
In the dark forest after Hera and Artemis vanished, Dionysus stared at the sky.
“Hey! There’s Dionysus!”
“Quiet, idiot. He looks out of it.”
Dawn.
Ampelos and Silenus joyfully welcomed Dionysus back from Artemis’ forest.
“You’re alive!”
“Hah, you should’ve seen this guy freaking out.”
“It wasn’t that bad!”
“…”
Despite their warmth, Dionysus stayed silent.
Only then did Ampelos and Silenus sense something wrong.
“What’s up? What happened?”
“Yeah. What kind of trial has you like this? Spill.”
After a long silence, Dionysus slowly explained Hera’s trial.
But unlike his distress, both smiled brightly.
“Dionysus, why are you stressed? For insulting a god, this is insanely merciful.”
“Exactly. You’ve already done huge.”
“But… I have to offer a sacrifice Artemis accepts.”
“Just do it. We were ready to pay the price the moment we defiled her forest.”
“Ampelos…”
“Honestly, we thought all Nysa satyrs were doomed. If one of us dies to calm her, that’s cheap.”
“Yeah, Dionysus. We’ll handle the sacrifice. You just focus on Hera’s trial.”
“Don’t worry about anything else. Mad Conqueror? No one’s ever beaten it. Legendary curse.”
“…”
Silenus and Ampelos sent him home to rest.
While Dionysus recovered from meeting the gods…
Silenus and Ampelos tended the cursed, collapsed satyrs and talked.
“Still, we’re lucky. It’ll end with one sacrifice.”
Ampelos said casually while nursing them.
Silenus raised an eyebrow.
“Why are you so sure the sacrifice is one of us? Could be something else.”
“Come on. You’ve heard the rumors about Artemis, right?”
Silenus muttered, ‘Fair point.’
“Hmm. But the problem is… None of these selfish bastards will volunteer.”
True—satyrs were instinct-driven egoists.
But Ampelos waved it off.
“Don’t worry. I’ve got it covered.”
“???”
“I’ll be the sacrifice.”
“…”
Silenus was stunned.
‘Was this guy treating it like a vacation?’
No way Ampelos was that dumb… but just in case, he asked softly:
“…You know what sacrifice means, right?”
Ampelos snapped, annoyed:
“Ugh, treat me like an idiot? I just don’t overthink inevitable shit. These morons wouldn’t sacrifice themselves in a million years. But me? Dionysus went this far for us. I can’t just sit back as his friend.”
“…”
Silenus was speechless—shocked and impressed.
‘This reckless, lust-crazed lunatic… is a real man.’
“Oh! Don’t tell Dionysus. He’ll flip at Artemis after the trial.”
“You’re right. With his personality, he’d never abandon friends.”
‘And I can’t just sit as his mentor. If even this troublemaker is stepping up…’